More News

After her son was born in 2004, Yvonne Bynoe made the difficult decision to give up her position at a think tank she co-founded so she could spend more time as a mom.

"It became really clear that I couldn't do it all," Bynoe says.

Her search for books on motherhood and life balance to guide her through that time on the shelves of local bookstores was unproductive. Most of the books she found focused on mothers who are affluent, married and Caucasian.

Bynoe decided to provide an alternative. In her new book, "Who's Your Mama? The Unsung Voices of Women and Mothers," she has compiled essays about motherhood written by a diverse group of women who all have unique parenting experiences. Among the topics are unplanned pregnancy, adoption, same-sex motherhood, single motherhood, miscarriage, raising biracial children and becoming a stepmother.

In response to her call for submissions, Bynoe received about 1,000 essays from all over the United States and as far away as India.

"It was a topic that was resonating with a lot of women," Bynoe says.

The two main requirements for inclusion in the book were that the pieces be first-person narratives and that they somehow spoke to her, Bynoe says.

"I also wanted to include the work of women who were not professional writers, average Janes who would not otherwise have a platform for their views," she writes in the book's introduction.

Liz Prato defends the decision not to have children in her essay, "Is Life without Kids Worth Living?"

"My husband and I decided not to have children for a variety of reasons, which range from the mess and noise commonly described as ‘kid chaos' to feeling that raising children would prevent us from achieving our artistic dreams," Prato writes.

Bynoe felt it was important to include voices from women who are not mothers. People have to understand, she insists, that "if you choose not to have children, that's legitimate."

Bynoe confined the book to essays written by Gen-X women, which she defines as those born between 1965 and 1981. She says her purpose in putting this project together is to nudge society toward understanding that motherhood today takes many shapes.

Rebecca Walker, the daughter of famous writer Alice Walker, wrote a foreword for Bynoe's book. Walker has written on motherhood and Bynoe cites her book, "Baby Love: Choosing Motherhood After a Lifetime of Ambivalence," as being very influential.

Bynoe's book addresses the many challenges that come with balancing motherhood and a career. Bynoe faces this challenge every day and calls herself a "work-at-home mother."

Bynoe writes extensively about hip hop culture and founded www.workingmomsmentor.com, a company that helps mothers better balance multiple demands.

There are some women who can balance high-powered jobs and motherhood, Bynoe says, but that's not for everyone.

"They have to decide for themselves what their personal priorities are," Bynoe says of mothers.

The most important thing for is women to be able to choose their own paths without feeling trapped by the opinions and expectations of family, friends and society.

Bynoe takes a novel approach to the age-old question of whether women can have it all.

"You can have it all, but not all at the same time," she says.

"Who's Your Mama? The Unsung Voices of Women and Mothers" is available for purchase online at www.amazon.com.