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Yvette Cade's abusive ex-husband once told her that he was going to fry her.

On Oct. 10, 2005, the threat turned real when he doused her with gasoline and set her on fire at the T-Mobile store where she was working in Prince George's County.

The flames burned more than 60 percent of her body, but she survived after a three-month hospital stay and numerous surgeries.

"I had no idea my perpetrator would be so vicious," Cade said.

Cade, 35, stood before a silent, rapt audience of mostly women Saturday at Frederick's Hood College as the keynote speaker at "My Sister's Keeper," an educational forum on domestic violence.

Her long hair was pulled back in a ponytail and a white blouse revealed her arms, bearing scars from that day. Cade, a petite, soft-spoken woman, has appeared on "Oprah" and other national television shows and travels the country to speak publicly about her abuse and survival and to advocate for victims of domestic violence.

The Frederick County alumnae chapter of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority organized the domestic violence forum as part of the sorority's regional day of service to educate about the problem and show how to help victims.

Khea Johnson, the event's co-chair and member of Delta Sigma Theta, said the sorority chooses a different topic every two years for its regional day of service. Saturday's event was the chapter's first on domestic violence. In the past, the group has focused on topics such as HIV/AIDS and diabetes, Johnson noted.

Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, the Frederick chapter of the National Association of Negro Business and Professional Women's Club, and Hood College's Strong Women of Today and Tomorrow club also sponsored the public forum.

Barbara Martin, CEO of Heartly House, attended and said that Heartly House has seen an increase in the demand for its services in Frederick County.

Heartly House provides legal representation, a 24-hour hotline, emergency shelter and counseling for victims of domestic violence and sexual abuse.

Martin noted that although the recession and unemployment are not causes of domestic violence, "it exacerbates what's going on," and places stress on couples who are already in bad relationships.

But Martin noted a silver lining. When there's an increasing need for services, the community becomes more aware of domestic violence and is more willing to talk about it, she said, and events such as "My Sister's Keeper" help.

Teresa Rivera Bean, assistant state's attorney for Frederick County, prosecutes domestic violence cases but noted that she hasn't seen an increase in the number of cases coming across her desk.

On Saturday, Bean led a presentation explaining the myths and realities of domestic violence. She defined domestic violence as "intimate partner violence" to include touching, threatening, destroying property, isolation from family and friends, financial threats and verbal abuse, among others.

According to Bean, the cultural value system of patriarchy and behavior learned from family are some causes of domestic violence. Poverty, lack of control or alcohol and substance abuse are not to blame for domestic violence. Women stay in abusive relationships out of fear, shame and hope that their partners will change, she added.

In her earlier remarks to the audience, Del. C. Sue Hecht (D-Dist. 3A) noted that every woman is at risk for domestic violence.

"If one of us can be raped or battered, we're all at risk," she said.

E-mail Katherine Mullen at kmullen@gazette.net.

Domestic violence is:

-The misuse of power and control in intimate relationships

-Physical, emotional, sexual

-Not caused by poverty, infidelity, alcohol/substance abuse or jealousy

National statistics

-1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime

-85 percent of domestic violence victims are women

-Boys who witness domestic violence are twice as likely to abuse their partners and children as adults

Source: National Coalition Against Domestic Violence